It’s Been Way Too Long…
Posted by admin | Filed under Insane in the MOMbrane, Womanhood, vintage ads
…since I’ve posted an offensive vintage ad. And these two are so bad you may actually start laughing, which is what I did. I mean, I laughed my ass off. Judge for yourselves.
And by far, my favorite of all times:
Oh my God, I CANNOT STOP LAUGHING.
On that note, if only I could have five minutes alone with the guys who came with this stuff. Just five minutes… It’s all I need…
Tags: sexist, vintage ads
You Know You Want It
Posted by admin | Filed under FYI, Uncategorized, Web Design, vintage ads
No, I'm not talking about my hot ass. I'm talking about an awesome, rockin' blog design. Yeah, baby!
Blogger or Wordpress, I do both. Oh, and non-blog sites too. You can find my work here, here, or here. And there are a lot more "here's" at that last site.
And while I'm on the subject (of wanting my hot ass), where'd my peeps go? Girlies who used to comment – have I somehow turned you off? It was the Xanax suppository comment, wasn't it? Why you gotta be like that, baby?
The people at "Lustre Creme" would like you to know that if you don't like pink, you're apparently not a girl. Bitch. Photo by jbcurio via Flickr.
Tags: blog, blog design, comments, pink, vintage ads, Web Design, xanax
Misogyny is Fun! Yay!
Posted by admin | Filed under Insane in the MOMbrane, Just plain funny, Uncategorized, vintage ads
Photo by jbcurio via Flickr.
Taken out of a page of my life. I mean, in every sense, really. The apron. The competing with the morning paper for TH's attention. The problem now is that I'm competing with my crazy-looking coffeemaker for TH's attention. Drat that Silex!
Tags: coffee, misogyny, vintage ad
And Yet Another Sexist Vintage Ad
Posted by admin | Filed under Insane in the MOMbrane, Just plain funny, vintage ads
This one had me laughing my ass off (and then telling TH to cook me some dinner STAT):
Photo by jbcurio via Flickr.
MOST husbands don't beat their wives. But seriously, what the fuck is wrong with you that your husband YAWNS at dinner? He may as well smack you down like the little bitch that you are. Buy some of our soup, you slut.
Tags: ad, vintage ad
Because I Should Work at Hertz
Posted by admin | Filed under Insane in the MOMbrane, Just plain funny, Womanhood, vintage ads
A vintage ad, since I'm trying to keep myself from writing about the pathetic drama that is my "neighborhood." No, don't ask, just read the goddamn ad.
Page One:
Page Two:
Photos by Lobstar28 via Flickr.
I don't know about you, but I would love to meet the dudes who came up with this ad and kick them in the nuts. Repeatedly.
Tags: ad, ads, Hertz, nuts, vintage ad
OMFG
Posted by admin | Filed under Insane in the MOMbrane, Womanhood, vintage ads
Photo by Lobstar28 via Flickr.
I'm not even sure what to say. She may have dreamed she went to a bar in her bra, but if I were her I'd be more concerned that I went to a bar IN THAT HAIR. Is that fucking lettuce on her head? How, exactly, did the advertisers at Maidenform figure this was going to help them sell their product? They kept this whole "I had a dream I did this or that in my Maiden Form bra" thing up for decades. And is it just me, or does that bra look majorly, hideously uncomfortable? It's all about the "spoke-stitching," people. And I have to say, I do agree that it shapes your tits to look natural. SNORT.
Tags: bra, Maidenform, vintage ad
Another Awesome(ly Old) Ad
Posted by admin | Filed under Insane in the MOMbrane, Just plain funny, Womanhood, vintage ads
I can't get enough of this shit. THANK GOD we live in this day and age. And in this country. That being said, I always, ALWAYS look like this chick when I vacuum the house. Know your fucking compact, people.
Tags: 1960s, vacuum, vintage ad
I Look Like Shit
Posted by admin | Filed under Motherhood, Stay At Home Moms, Uncategorized, Womanhood, vintage ads
This is a sentiment us mommies often feel. And by "often" I mean ALL THE TIME. Because once upon a time, we were able (and willing) to blow dry our hair, shave our legs, and tweeze our eyebrows to perfection. Now, as 50% of you point out, we don't have time to brush our teeth let alone put some makeup on.
Look, when you're up all night with a screaming baby/toddler/preschooler, and then spending your days juggling said demanding baby/toddler/preschooler, not to mention keeping some semblance of order to the household, something has to give. And most often that something is your personal appearance. Hell, we're in bodies we don't remotely recognize as our own – leaky, ginormous boobs; saggy, wrinkly skin; vaginas that swallow tampons whole – so what's the point in putting on some mascara? AS IF mascara is going to help the fact that we haven't bathed in three days.
The truth is, putting on some makeup, even on days when we don't go anywhere, makes a difference. First, you're doing something for YOU. Second, it makes you feel just a tiny bit better about yourself. I, for one, put concealer on every day, even if I spend the entire day scrubbing feces from the carpet. Why? Because I can't stand walking by a mirror and seeing the dark circles under my eyes, or the zits that have magically appeared overnight. Putting some concealer on deceives me into believing that someday, I may actually have the time and desire to put some mascara and blush on, as well. And while I'm on the subject, those 3-in-1 makeup products are awesome for times like these – I'm a big fan of this stuff because it makes you look, well, undead, and it's as easy as slapping on some moisturizer. Trust me, it's worth the price.
To the reader who puts "everything" on every day, even when she's just home with the kids – you rock, girlfriend!
Don't forget to check out the new poll question in the right-hand column…
Because nothing says "man-oriented" like flowers in the hair. Gotta love the 60s. Photo by Lobstar28 via Flickr.
Tags: appearance, concealer, make-up, makeup, mascara, poll, polls, self-esteem, vagina, vintage ad
